


mild mustard

by ekavi



Category: Bleach
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, F/M, Gen, Ichigo and Rukia wouldn't listen to black metal but then again my characters aren't losers, guest star; king diamond's abigail
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-05
Updated: 2017-03-10
Packaged: 2018-09-22 06:13:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,531
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9587552
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ekavi/pseuds/ekavi
Summary: Cigarettes, alcohol and well seasoned dinners. Some days, college life is beautiful.[Ichigo/Rukia, University AU, Oneshot, OOC because my characters aren't pitiful losers.]





	1. Rašīd

**Author's Note:**

> This Ichigo doesn't have bright orange hair because he isn't a buoy. Or a text highlighter. Or a loser.
> 
> If you read Bleach, your standards are low enough to read this as well.

Rukia left the building sprinting towards the car in an attempt to escape the freezing air of November. Today has been particularly cold, the temperature barely reaches 2°C. The weather forecast had been warning for this wave of cold for the past four days so everyone was dressed appropriately for such conditions. She spotted the familiar car parked just couple meters away from her. Knowing that the car's heater would have made the vehicle warm and toasty she speeded up until she reached the car and hopped inside in seconds.    
   
The warm air conditioning brushed her face and she relaxed in the passenger seat, closing her eyes and sighing in relief.    
   
"I forgot my gloves this morning and my fingers are frozen", she said keeping her eyes closed and her voice giving away her slight irritation.   
   
"Really, huh", a voice said. A voice that certainly did not belong to the owner of this car. Her eyes shot open, she jumped in the seat when she turned to look at the driver who was, in fact, not her friend Ishida.    
   
Terrified, she started gathering her satchel to leave, "Oh my god, I am so sorry. I thought this was my friend's car, please excuse me." she said and raised her hand to reach the door handle.   
   
"Well, it is your friend's car. I just happen not to be that friend", he replied amused by her reaction.   
   
"Huh?"   
   
"I'm sorry", he laughed. "I am Ichigo, Ishida's roommate. He couldn't pick you up today because he still hasn't returned from the ophthalmologist so he asked me. You're Rukia, right?"   
   
"Oh, I see. I'm sorry, I got scared for a moment there, you never know with people these days. Nice to meet you, I've heard about you from Ishida. Mainly that you're an inadequate idiot.", she says laughing now that she had relaxed.   
   
"Yup, sounds just like Ishida.", Ichigo admits and starts the car.    
   
"So, Ichigo, since I've never seen you around I think it's safe to assume you don't study in this university.", Rukia says easily, he's Ishida's best friend after all, he can't be too bad.    
   
"I study philology, you know, much more theoretical stuff than you guys in chemistry", he replies just as easily   
   
After she names her address and instructs him to take the right turns, she finds out that Ichigo is indeed a very easy going guy. She didn't expect a fun ride with a stranger so she is pleasantly surprised.    
   
Once they reach the highway though, they are faced with a myriad of cars, all lanes are packed and no one is moving. It's already too late to make a turn and leave so they find themselves stuck. In the middle of the highway. In traffic. Noon.   
   
"Why there are so many cars in the road, why can't they stay home to have lunch", Ichigo whines after the realisation of being stuck settles in. He is annoyed, more by the fact that he hasn't had lunch himself. He only expected that this car pool business would take around 30 minutes and no more so he didn't rush to make his lunch.    
   
Rukia wasn't doing much better, she hadn't had lunch either and she hadn't eaten since breakfast so she was famished.    
"Oh man, it's going to take hours for the road to clean with this pace." Which was true. Everyone was unmoving for at least 15 minutes.    
   
"Do you think it will be alright if I leave the car to go find something to eat? I am starving over here.", Rukia suggests, mostly speaking to herself since she had decided to do so already and was just announcing her plan.   
   
"Yeah, the traffic jam seems more than 2 km long, we're not going anywhere any time soon.", Ichigo says   
   
"Alright, do you want me to pick something up for you?", she asks him as she opens the door to exit.   
   
"Well, I eat everything so I will have whatever you have." She nods and closes the car door behind her.    
   
Ichigo turns on the radio and relaxes in his seat, since he couldn't do anything else, a little eye shut wouldn't hurt anyone.    
   
Rukia returns after 15 minutes, laughing lightly when she saw that he jumped from his nap startled when she opened the door. "I got sandwiches, cocoa milk, water and a salad", she says. "I hope you like this sandwich, it's what I prefer." 

 

"Right now, I would even eat from the trash", he murmurs as dives his hand ungracefully into the plastic bag to find his share of food. He pulls out the sandwich and takes a bite, satisfied with the choice of ingredients. It consists of fried bacon, edam cheese, tomato, lettuce, baloney and a sauce with mayonnaise and ketchup. "I like your preferred sandwich, I was afraid you would have added pickles. God knows I hate pickles." He seems more relaxed now with a full stomach.    
   
"Nah, pickles don't work for me either so don't worry."   
   
"No, you don't understand. I hate pickles. I used to eat these cheeseburgers when I was a kid and had to specifically tell them not to put pickles inside and the bastards did every single time. Ruined my cheeseburger time.", he says half joking and half irritated as he recalls his unfortunate encounters with pickles from his childhood.      
   
"Oh my god, I know exactly what cheeseburger you're referring to. From a place called 'Johnny' or something, right?" she quickly adds.   
   
"Yes! You know that damned place as well?", he turns to look at her properly for the first time since she got into the car. The first thing he notices is her hands. She has delicate hands, from her slim wrists to her long fingers and manicured nails. She is holding the water bottle in her small grasp so prettily, he muses. He understands why Ishida hangs out with her, her presence is more than gentle, more than pleasant. She is as graceful as a Bolshoi prima ballerina middle White Adagio. She carries in her gaze all the prayers, dark secrets and desperate confessions that the tapestry of a church has ever listened and she is as silent about them as the holy grounds at midnight.  

She has a petite structure, petite but all woman. Her raven hair brush her chin, it's wavy in its natural ruffled state.    
   
"I used to eat there with my sister when I was a kid. Though they did use a really good mild mustard in their burgers.", Rukia replies, her eyes fixed on sealing the water lid back on and placing it in her bag.    
   
His stare doesn't linger long, just enough to study his newfound company.    
   
Despite her small frame, Ishida's friend, Rukia doesn't look like a child at all. Her face angles are sharpened, her voice deep and smooth, her eyes a grey blue. She is a beautiful woman, he concludes.    
   
"So, how do you know Ishida? One would think that in order for him to share an apartment with someone else, he must have checked his medical record, criminal record maybe, family background etc. ", she's genuinely curious.   
   
He laughs. "You are not far from truth. We are family friends. We've known each other since forever."    
   
And so they start talking again, topics vary from weather to political leadership.  The fact that they have been stuck in the traffic for the past two hours long forgotten. Ishida calls at some point, checking on them. After a few moments Ichigo had picked up, he passes the device to Rukia scoffing.    
   
"Yes?"    
   
"Hey," Ishida greets. "Sorry for the inconvenience today, I just got back."   
   
"It's okay, don't worry about it.", she reassure. She fills him in with what he missed today at university and  hangs up the phone shortly after. "He said to tell you that he's going to work now and to cook dinner for him like the obedient wife you are.", Rukia laughs out loud when she transfers Ishida's words to Ichigo. She is very amused by their constant bickering state, almost like an old couple. Even though Ishida keeps bad mouthing Kurosaki she can tell he truly cares about him and the banter is how they communicate.    
   
"Did you tell him to fuck off? I am not his mother to cook for him.", he says angrily but Rukia can tell he doesn't mean it.   
   
Rukia herself has many acquaintances but the list with the names of people she considers friends in a good day includes 3 people and a cat. Her relationship with Ishida falls very natural into her life. They are lab partners so they usually find themselves spending time together. Her apartment is closer to university and Ishida uses that road to reach his destination so he picks her up every day.    
   
Ichigo falls as easy as Ishida, she thinks. As easy as staying in bed on a Sunday morning with the sun rays spilling into the room and caressing your cold skin. 

His face has a rough tone carved to it, spoken in lines forming between his eyebrows. His eyes carry secrets, sleepless night and heartbreak. Still, he chooses words that conceal the hardness of his voice, the countless cigarettes butts and beer bottles that have rested upon his lips. He chooses words that confess a nonchalant speaker, a newborn child hidden away from everything evil and every burden that blackens your heart.   
   
But she knows the stare all too well, she recognises that firm grip that he holds on the steering wheel. His laugh is genuine and raspy and the sound of it feels familiar to her ears. It's the laugh of someone who runs on a heavy heart, of someone whose chest tightens every time the sun sets and the moon rises.    
   
But there's no better beauty than the one of a deep scarred heart, he is his own poem of white lies. His face is sprinkled with light brown freckles, his hair is a dark orange, almost a honey brown under the dark colours of a late evening sky.    
   
She watches as his lips move, forming some words she doesn't bother listening. He laughs again, she can tell by the way his face contorts. She smiles back, for no reason at all.   
   
After a few moments, she inspects the glovebox and her hand fishes a CD jewel case.    
   
"King Diamond?! Is this yours?", she exclaims and hurriedly opens the case to make sure the DC is in there and then turns the player on to give it a listen.    
   
"Well, does Ishida seem like the guy who would listen to King Diamond? I don't think so. He is into some Mozart shit", by the time he finishes his sentence the music is loud through the car speakers. "You like King Diamond?"    
   
"Yes, I grew up listening to this particular record," Ichigo opens his mouth to speak but she quickly adds "Don't ask why I listened to this stuff when I was a kid. I don't know" and his mouth closes immediately, all too amused by her and her peculiar childhood taste in music.    
   
"Abigail, 1987, that's one of my favourite records. Though I do admit it does take a while to get used to this type of vocals.", he comments and she agrees by nodding.    
   
"I hope you don't mind me stealing this CD from you for while", Rukia jokes at some point between their choir singing.    
   
"Don't you dare.", he warns playfully.    
   
They spent the rest hour singing along to the music, trying to mimic the falsetto while laughing.     
   
After 4 long hours, the cars start slowly and hesitantly to move again. By 5 o'clock they have finally reached her house and she is getting ready to leave.    
   
"I am sorry you had to stay in the car for 4 hours just because I can't use the public transportation.", she looks at him guiltily. Her hands wander around the car though he is too busy looking at her to see what she's doing.    
   
"Nah, don't worry about it. It wasn't bad."      
   
"Yeah, it wasn't bad.", she parrots. Her words hold the same meaning as his and, as he look at her, he understands it.    
   
Rukia found her way naturally to the passenger seat yet exiting the car doesn't feel that way, he thinks.   
   
He grabs the plastic bag in which they had store their now empty food containers and he lifts it up for her to see. 

"Since you paid for this, drop by my place sometime to eat Ishida's portion of dinner. It's worth just for seeing him mad.", Ichigo offers.   
   
"Will do.", she says, a small smile forms on her lips as she looks at him while leaning against the open car door. He tilts his head and returns the smile.    
   
He watches her taking her keys out of her satchel and opening the apartment door, once she is inside she turns to him once again saying, "Hey Ichigo" His head shots up, surprised that she had called him. "Ishida was right, you indeed are an obedient wife!", she laughs and she locks herself into the apartment before he can even open his mouth.    
   
"What an idiot.", Ichigo says shaking his head disapprovingly. The smile never falters. 

 

  
•   
•   
•

He turns the key in the ignition and the car comes to life once again. While he is driving back home, his hand reaches for the CD player and pushes the ON button but no melody reaches his ears. Without taking his eyes off the road, he pushes the button again and again, until he stops at a red light only to find out that the CD is missing from its rightful place.   
  
  
  
  


 

"The bitch took my CD!!"


	2. 1799

"Hey, Rukia."

"Hey, wake up sleepy."

A voice keeps interrupting Rukia's sleep and in all honesty, she is starting to get irritated.

"What", she murmurs against the pillow but remained still under the covers.

"Open your mouth"

Her brain is still dead from sleeping but every fibre of logic and consciousness inside of her screams to disobey the order.

Despite herself, she opens her mouth.

Something fluffy, tasty and pleasant fills her open mouth and on instinct she chews. Her eyes shot open when her mouth is filled with chocolate flavour. Really good chocolate flavour. It smells delicious and tastes even better. She looks at Ichigo who is smiling triumphantly at her.

"You approve? Chocolate cake. I made it yesterday night."

"Ichigo, this is delicious, where did you get the recipe?"

"In a dark corner of the internet. Here.", he says as he offers her a glass of milk. "Do you want more?"

She accepts the glass happily. "Oh yes"

He kisses her cheek quickly and starts walking away from the bedroom. "I actually have a recipe for the vanilla version of this cake as well. I will try that out at some point."

"I have shaped you into such a great housewife. All you need now is a pair of huge boobs and a lobotomy.", Rukia teases.

"See? This is what I get for being nice. Shame on you, husband.", he plays right back with her. He comes back to the room with more cake and a glass of orange juice this time.

And they dare not to move from bed till noon.

He always liked weekends. Always some way or another he would found his way in bed with her, a naked mess and dirty sheets.

There's this something growing in him, something akin to pride, something akin to honour that wells up whenever he sees her like that. The light of the evening sun slips through the blinds. It has taken up a golden hue, it's strong before it will eventually fade away. It's warm on her smooth skin. It's always like this when she takes a sit next to him, ready, really ready to unveil her secrets, her fears and whatever is that which keeps her up at night.

Rukia tells him stories of heartbreak with a cigarette and a glass of wine in hand. They stay laying on the cold balcony floor for hours, words escaping them so easily, so lightly.

Ichigo tells her stories of guilt wrapped up within her, his face buried into her skin. Almost as if this tiny woman will fight away everything that haunts his sleep.

Two months after meeting Rukia, he stays up again all night. This time though, he doesn't complain.

  
A year later after Ichigo and Rukia met, Ichigo got his own apartment approximately 10 minutes away from his old one and Rukia's. It quickly became a place for Rukia to hang out, he half-heartedly complained about it because he had to wash twice the cutlery and dishes but in all honesty he loved having her around, laid naked on his bed or walking around in just her underwear.

One Saturday morning, Rukia was up earlier than Ichigo and allowed him a few more hours of sleep while she got out of the bed to prepare breakfast.

She walked over to his bookcase, a wooden white one in the living room. He had prettily arranged his books in order in one shelve, his stereo system was placed on the next one. She couldn't help but notice that in the shelve with his music records, there were two frames that did not exist in his shared apartment with Ishida. One of the pictures was a portrait of his mother when she was young. Around 20 years old, Rukia speculated.

Her eyes fell on the second frame. It was a photograph of her and Ishida, with them sitting on the floor of his previous living room, laughing about something. A bottle of beer in Ishida's hand and a cigarette in hers. It had been a typical night of theirs since that's how they used -still do- spend their nights. They gathered at Ishida and Ichigo's shared apartment and they would spend whole hours cooking dinner, eating, drinking, playing video games.

Half of her wanted to call Ishida and make fun of Ichigo for having this photo in his home but the other half felt touched by such gesture. Especially since it was a picture that he wasn't in, especially since it was located so carefully next to the other frame that obviously held so much emotional value for him. Rukia, out of all people, was the one most grateful to Ichigo for giving her friends and a new place to call home, somewhere to belong. She picked up her mobile phone and wondered what she should do.

Eventually, she rested her device on the kitchen table and trotted towards the bedroom to find Ichigo. Ishida could wait for a couple more hours, she on the other hand, couldn't.

* * *

"Wait to see him in diapers walking around my house.", Ishida spoke as he was coming from the kitchen with a new bottle of wine in hand. It was a summer night and all three of them were sitting on the balcony of Ishida's house, drinking and chatting away. Earlier this week, Ishida had discovered photo albums from his childhood and many of them featured Ichigo and his family as they were located at his house for a dinner gathering. Their parents apparently have been friends for years, consequently Ishida and Ichigo grew up together. Like brothers, she thought.

Ichigo huffs, "As if you looked any better, sometimes I think you came out of your mother with glasses on."

"As you can see for yourself Rukia he has been ugly since he was a kid. Nothing new here to be observed.", Ishida comments to Rukia, completely disregarding Ichigo.

"Aw, I think he was cute. Look at his little butt in this one.", she points at a picture in which Ichigo was naked and they laugh.

"Why would even have a photograph of me naked, you pervert. I am not even 3 in this one!", Ichigo yells at him

"Watch it now, Kurosaki. I wouldn't want Rukia to accidentally find the photo album from your teenage years."

"You better burn it"

"No, I wanna see!", Rukia flies immediately between the two quarrelling friends to search for such an album midst the pile of them that are resting in front of Ishida on the table.

At that moment though, they were both looking at the same picture, a picture of two little boys and two beautiful women holding them in their arms.

Rukia knows. It wouldn't take long for anyone to realise how Ichigo and Ishida's relationship  
works. Especially now that she is aware that they share their most tragic moment and deepest scar. They went through this together, she thinks. And they powered through it.

"Look, you've always been in love with me, Ichigo.", Ishida breaks the silence.

"It's true, he has a photo of you in his living room!", Rukia says and jumps out of Ichigo's reach when he tried to grab her. She runs into the house to escape and Ichigo right behind her yelling something about a bitch and 'I will kill you in your sleep'

* * *

 

Ichigo and Rukia have been in the bookstore for more than 30 minutes and Ichigo was getting irritated and most importantly, hungry. Rukia had been searching for a book all this time but unsuccessfully.

“Maybe we could come back when you actually remember what book you are looking for?”, Ichigo suggests as politely as he could at that point.

“I remember which book I’m looking for, Ichigo”

“Oh yeah, you are just momentarily forgetting the title of it.”

“Exactly.”

“And the name of the author.”

“Indeed.”

“And entire plot.”

“I don’t get where you are going with this, Ichigo.”

“Let me put it this way. You are looking for a book. Which could be any book. In a bookstore. Think about it logically, we are never leaving this place.”

“You are insufferable. Look,” she points at the lady standing at the info point, “she will know which book it is.”

“Hi, can I help you?”, asks the lady.

Rukia enthusiastically readies herself to speak while Ichigo is playing angrily with the books and leaflets that are laying on the counter.

“Yes, thank you. I’m looking for this book but, you see, I don’t recall the title right now.”

“Hm, do you remember the name of the author?”

“Well.. I think he is Russian?”, Rukia says more to herself. Ichigo laughs sarcastically under his breath. “She asked you for the name, not the ethnicity.”

“No, no. He is Ukrainian.”, Rukia rushes to correct herself completely disregarding Ichigo’s bitter comment.

“No, wait. He is from Bulgaria. No, Romania! Crap, I don’t remember with all these countries there.”

“I am sorry, I cannot help you. Maybe you can tell me a little bit of the plot?”, says the woman politely.

“Well, there is this guy. Not too old. And he does this job which I don’t remember either. He goes to the cinema one evening.”

“Let me check on the computer.”, replies the lady and walks away from them.

“Rukia, let’s go right now, she is going to call an ambulance.”, Ichigo whispers to her hastily in nervousness.

The info lady returns just as Rukia was ready to open her mouth to reply and speaks up, “So, I found the book you are looking for.”

“Really?!”, Rukia says excitedly.

“What..”, Ichigo deadpans.

“Yeah, it’s called ‘The death of the clerk’ by Chekhov.”

“Oh my god! That’s the one!”, Rukia jumps in surprise.

“Unbelievable.”, Ichigo shakes his head in disbelief.

After Rukia has completed her purchase, -surreal, Ichigo comments- she throws her arm over Ichigo’s shoulder and smiles up at him. “Come on, lunch is on me.”

He tucks her securely to his side and continues walking, concealing a smile. 

* * *

  
"No, Ichigo. You're gonna ruin my hair!", Rukia runs around the sofa so he doesn't catch up with her.

"Come on, it will be fun.", Ichigo whines playfully in a child-like voice.

"Of course it will be fun. You are going to make me look like a clown."

"Who says these things, I, such a multi talented man--"

"Watch it there, multi mulinex."

"If you let me give you a haircut, I will do whatever you want."

"Will you make me a cheesecake?"

"That's not even a challenge, Rukia. Get creative."

"Two cheesecakes."

"I'm already bored to death.", he taps his foot on the ground lazily.

"Do the laundry"

"I already do the laundry any--"

"Irrelevant.", she cuts absurdly. She pauses and sighs. She did need a haircut. He knows of course that she would waver, especially after being so tired and after nagging that she hates her hair at this length.  
She sighs in defeat. "You do know you need to use professional scissors?" He smiles.

"Yeah, sweetheart, I know." He brushes her hair away from her neck and places a small kiss while caressing her both arms.

Ichigo wraps her in his arms and leads her towards the kitchen where he sits her on a chair. After draping her with a long white towel, he takes the scissors in hand.  
  
"So, tell me, how was your day at work? Did you spit in all the mochaccinos?", Ichigo asks as he starts working experimentally with the scissors.

"Ew, Ichigo. That's unsanitary.", she comments disgusted.

"That hasn't stopped you before from doing things."

"Says you who ate chocolate after it had fell on the floor."

"Hey! That was one time!"

In all honesty, he had no idea what he was doing with a pair of scissors in his hands. He was sure once he was done with her, her hair would still be uneven even though he tries to cut as well as he can. Well, personal style.

"Am I ready to lead Cirque du Soleil just yet?", Rukia calls after a while.

"Give me a few more minutes to finish off my masterpiece"

"I'm so screwed. What have you done?"

"Oh, shush now. It's perfect."  
  
Ichigo takes care of some strands that seemed longer than the others and some forgotten ones and steps back to see the result. Her hair is visibly shorter and it reaches a little under her chin. He judges that it's good enough and encourages her to check the result in the bathroom mirror. After a few moments she enters the bathroom, the house remains silent. He thinks that's a good sign, she didn't scream when she faced her reflection.

"I believe this was the uttermost sign of trust in our relationship, Ichigo. We have finally peaked.", Rukia says when she comes out of the bathroom.

He had already started cleaning away the hair off the kitchen floor. "Yeah, I didn't think you would actually agree. Maybe it's the exhaustion. Don't stab me in the neck with the scissors when you realise what happened."

"Well, if we are being honest, you did a great job. It's not half bad."

"Well,", he starts using her voice tone, "if we are being honest, you don't look half bad"

Somehow, she ends up sprawled on their bed, resting besides Ichigo while he orders food off a delivery catalogue. And somehow, she cannot imagine a better place to be at.


End file.
